What type of man do I want to be?
What values do I need to live out loud? We build the world we want.
I grew up in the kind of neighborhood where kids could just be kids.
We rode bikes until the streetlights came on. Neighbors called each other by name, exchanging lawn care and gardening tips. If your family ran out of sugar or flour, you’d knock on someone’s door without hesitation. Adults chatted on porches while kids played tag in the yard. People might have disagreed and held different world views, but they still waved hello. They still laughed at the same jokes. They still showed up for one another.
There was a warmth and safety to it all. You felt a quiet understanding that even though the world could be messy, this place and these people would treat you right.
And it wasn’t just about what we did. It was about what we believed. We were taught to listen before we spoke, to respect others even when we didn’t agree. We didn’t talk over one another. We didn’t tear people down for the sake of winning an argument. We understood that words mattered and that how you carried yourself in public mattered too.
Those were the values that shaped my childhood, and they paved a path for the type of man I could become.
But lately, I’m noticing how rare that kind of decency feels, particularly in public spaces. The loudest voices seem to be the most combative. Disagreement often turns into dehumanization. Shouting has replaced listening. And the values I grew up with (such as respect, community, humility) feel like they are fading from the spotlight.
But… I don’t believe they are gone.
Most of us, in our everyday lives, still live by those principles. On a local scale, we still help our neighbors. We still hold the door for strangers. We still teach kids to say “please” and “thank you.”
But we’re quiet about it. And maybe now is the time to stop being so quiet.
I’ve been asking myself:
What type of man do I want to be? What values do I need to live out loud, especially as a man?
This moment in time feels like a turning point. Everything is moving so fast with technology, politics, identity, culture. In all that noise, it’s easy to feel like you have to change who you are just to keep up with the loudest voices in the room. But change isn’t always progress. And it isn’t always right.
Some things are worth holding onto.
Integrity means staying true to your values when it would be easier not to. These days, that kind of integrity matters more than ever…because someone is watching. Whether it’s your neighbor, your coworkers, your friends, or the kid looking up to you from afar, you are shaping culture. You are showing them what is acceptable. What is respectable. What is possible.
And I think about those kids, in particular, a lot.
Because I had the gift of a childhood where people were kind to one another, where community was real, and where adults made sure we all felt safe enough to be kids. That gave me a foundation I still stand on today.
And now, it’s on us—the adults—to remind the world that this culture still exists.
To be the ones who listen, who lead with empathy, who look out for one another.
To walk the world with values like respect, unity, and decency. It isn’t just for ourselves, but for the upcoming generations who will build this world with us.
The world is changing. But that doesn’t mean we have to lose ourselves in the process.
Let’s be the kind of people our younger selves would look up to.
That’s the type of man I aim to be.